photos by dad
Hi hello. Last week was torturous. It was one of the hardest times this year. It got so bad until I reached the point where I thought I was just going to give up and quit college. Never really had that thought before. I was so mad at myself and the whole universe just because I couldn't get it right and every week I have a critique session with my lecturer, he's always rejecting my work, and that hurts so much you have no idea. I remember one night last week, a night just before that specific class, I sat at the edge of my bed, bowed my head and cupped my hands together. I was alone and sitting still in the darkness. When I closed my eyes, after a couple of deep breathing, tears just started rolling down my cheeks. The waterworks got so bad I was about to choke. He was there. Right beside me, I could feel it. He was whispering love and strength and comfort into my heart. I don't know how to explain that moment but I know that it was calming. Knowing that He's there to lift me every single time I fall.
* * *
I just finished reading the book of Psalms; I'm now reading the book of Proverbs. This morning I was doing my devotion and I read Proverbs chapter 3. I highlighted the whole chapter because I needed those words to get me through hard times like these. One of the verse in it that I am holding onto is verse 5-8. It says "Trust the Lord with all your heart, and don't depend on your own understanding. Remember the Lord in all you do, and he will give you success. Don't depend on your own wisdom. Respect the Lord and refuse to do wrong. Then your body will be healthy, and your bones will be strong."
Also, thank you Autumn Ripple for this lovely blouse! It's so pretty >.<